I feel like screaming

Last week, we sent a student teacher on her way. Without going into details, everyone at the school had had enough. Besides, she was finished with her solo teaching. While I would never hire her, she'll graduate this weekend even though she hasn't taken the test in order for her to be certified.

Because she has to have the last word, she has been telling all kinds of stories about the teachers at my school. While most of them aren't likely true, I am concerned about one thing she reported. And it could be true. And I can't ignore it.

DAMNNIT!

All this to distract from her faults. All this for me to contend with which is probably going to make me want to drink the whole box 'o wine tonight.

This afternoon, I have to go meet with the Deans of Education. Should I introduce myself as the Beth of Education for my school? Am I the only one who thinks the title "Dean" sounds silly?

Why do I feel like I'm going to be in trouble?

Now Don't That Beat All

A few years ago, I had a meeting with a parent who wore a t-shirt that said, "PORN - It's cheaper than dating." I kid you not.

Do you know how hard it is to make eye contact with a Dad who would actually wear that shirt to his child's school? Would you be surprised to find out we needed to discuss behavioral issues? No?

Today, we had a meeting with some parents who gave me that same "jaw-dropping" feeling. First, the background info. Bam-bam is a student with diabetes. One day, he tried to run away from the school because we he wanted to go home with his mother. I won't bore you with the details but it ended with Bam-bam tearing up my office and being retrained by a school resource officer and a teacher. Amazingly, the parents were mad with everyone at the school. Looking back, we shouldn't have been amazed. This mother wiped her son's butt until he was in 2nd grade.

Now, when Bam-bam runs away, we report that he is running North on whatever street. Please send for backup. That way the little kid (&*#@) can just tear up the patrol car. I like my office to stay nice and neat.

So, now that you have the visual of the type kid we are dealing with (you do have a visual, right?), let's move on to the meeting we had today. Bam-bam's parents were told that Bam-bam wasn't passing his classes and was in danger of being retained. Apparently, all those low grades from when he refuses to work are having a negative impact on his overall performance.

That was when the dad stood up to announce to me that his son was NOT going to be retained. And his reason was this. When he dropped out of school in the 8th grade, he went to take the GED. And did you know that he scored the highest of anyone in that group taking the GED? And so, therefore, his son did not need to be retained nor did he have to complete all his work to prove to the world that he was smart. And everyone in the sanitation department knew that he was one of the smartest ones in the department.

I may or may not have piddled in my piddle pad. And now I'm looking for a deal in Vegas. I think I have the poker face down now.