Thursday, October 1, 2009

Wishful Thinking - with a little help from John Mayer

One day, I really do wish I could say what I want to say.  What I should have said.  There are a lot of things out there that really aren’t funny and should probably be said.  Still, I want to be able to earn my retirement.  Maybe I should look into placing advertisements on my blog.

“Take all of your wasted honor
Every little past frustration
Take all of your so-called problems,
Better put ‘em in quotations

Say what you mean to say…”

If I were independently rich felt like my job wouldn’t be in jeopardy, I’d have a lot of things I’d like to say to my supervisors.  It speaks volumes about how out of touch you are with what is going on in the schools when you call me during dismissal time.  And let’s not even open the can of worms called “passing the buck.”  You are the boss.  That means it is in your power to make a decision and stick with it - even if there are some who don’t like it.  Just grow a spine.

“Walking like a one man army
Fighting with the shadows in your head
Living out the same old moment
Knowing you'd be better off instead,
If you could only ...

Say what you mean to say…”

If there could be a motto to use with my teachers, it would be, “Grow UP!”  How old do you freakin have to be to figure out that life ain’t exactly fair.  Learn to take the high road despite having ovaries.  And just because you don’t agree with a rule doesn’t mean it is your right to challenge it.  Besides, the grass will never grow in the side yard if you don’t stop parking your car there.  And, yes, I do think you need the extra exercise that you’ll get by parking in the teacher parking lot.

“Have no fear for giving in
Have no fear for giving over
You'd better know that in the end
Its better to say too much
Then never say what you need to say again”

The creatively cruel manners of some parents never cease to amaze me.  There is absolutely nothing funny about using duct tape in any shape or form as a means for discipline.  And not having your kids in school on time or at all because you are too sorry to get up is educational neglect.  Try to put yourself in your kid’s shoes.  It isn’t fun being the one who is always tardy or trying to catch up on missing assignments.  It is obvious you can procreate well.  Now try to learn how to demonstrate a caring attitude.

“Even if your hands are shaking
And your faith is broken
Even as the eyes are closing
Do it with a heart wide open

Say what you mean to say…”

Some of my students can be so mean.  And so street smart.  How sad I feel for you and your loss of innocence.  Who treated you so cruelly that you felt it was okay to do the same to another human being?  I hope one day you’ll know that you were loved.  Even when I was disappointed or angry, you were loved.

Just don’t grow up to be one of those spineless supervisors, whining teachers, or disassociated parents.  There is only so long I can hold my tongue.  There will come that day when I really will say what I mean to say.


Kristina P. said...

Sigh. I know how you feel.

Candice said...

Great song, and great post.

You can always create an incognito blog for those moments when you just can't bite your tongue any longer.

cheatymoon said...

You, my friend, need a password protected blog. You know where to email me if you really need to rant.

Trust me, I could use the distraction.


(Plus I could tell you about my supervisors antics!)

Ann Imig said...

This is a heartbreaking post. It's so hard being the one in charge, and not being able to tell it like it is--to the administration, to teachers, to parents.

Thank goodness you have a blog.

I hope you have a very supportive shoulder to lean on. Or a whole village of shoulders.

Thanks so much for you comment on WOW. What an awesome thing to say.


Beth said...

Kristina - I'm sure you hear some far out excuses.

Candice - I've considered starting an incognito blog. Maybe I should...

Movie - I do need a password protected blog! Maybe that'll be the weekend project.

Ann - Thankfully, my husband is a really good listener. And I DO love to read your writing! I'd buy a book if there were one.

Hit 40 said...

A+++ Very impressive post. I love how you weaved your words around the song. Wow. I wonder how your teachers would like a presentation like this to motivate them to be their best? I will have to ponder a good song for us to work around. Maybe, Otin can come up with one for us.

You are very caring and obviously trying over 100% Too bad the rest of them are not on the same train with you!!

Don't get me started on the parents!!!

Chris said...


I propose one day a year, let's arbitrarily say, October 18th, to be known as "Amnesty Day". Anyone can say anything they want to, with no repercussions whatsoever.

Think of the fun.

Everyday Goddess said...

Duct tape?

You are a remarkable person. I wonder if any of them are aware of that.

Keep the faith, even when it's brutally hard to do so. We are all on your side.

Mike said...

Take this for what it is worth.... I am always asked why I do not start my own company. My answer: I might make some more money, but the way it is now, when I go home at night, I am done for the day, I have no worries until the next day. When you are in charge or own a company, the headaches never end. Some people are cut out to deal with the crap, others are not!

Cristin said...

So... duct tape isn't cool? Crap.


Anonymous said...

duct tape? for real? I love my principal...she says it how it is- and we don't mind it at all.

Jan said...

Duct tape??? I don't know how to feel about that. Well, yeah - I guess I do.

I'm appalled.

I understand what it's like to be so frustrated by your child and their actions that you're at a loss as to what to do next. I know what it's like to be so lonely and confused and afraid that you don't know what to do.

Duct tape is NOT the answer.

Beth, I've said this before, and I'll say it again - I don't know how you do what you do day in and day out.

k said...

Oh ick. I bet feeling like that makes for some really long days. Sorry!

I also think I might get a taste of some of that myself come next year!

Laura Marchant said...

Are you sure we haven't worked together before, lol! I so understand this!!!

Anonymous said...

Sometimes it just feels good to get it off your chest!

Chief said...

How is it that we can live in different parts of the country but still work at the same exact school!?

Pseudo said...

Oh Beth, I do hope you post a blog on Movie's unbloggable site. I would love to hear more on each of these ; -)

And cut tape? Really?

On another note, we had a faculty meeting today to work out a new bell schedule with the 17 furlough Fridays. That was fun. I am so not the whiner. I just ask someone I think has more common sense than me "which one are you voting for?"

But the whiners.... they can really make a meeting go longer than necessary.

sun lover said...

Oh how I wish the day will come that you really will say what you mean to say. In a perfect world you wouldn't have to earn your retirement because I will have won the lottery and would so pass some money your way just so I could watch you tell all to take this job and shove it and say what you should have said all along.

My hope for you, is for you know that you are loved. Your dedication to disassociated parents, whinny teachers and those spineless supervisors does not go unnoticed.

Beth said...

Hit 40 - You are right on about some of the parents. Some of them are downright bullies.

DK - You are brilliant! I think I'll write my congressman.

Goddess - You always know the right thing to say.

Otin - I am beginning to think I'm not cut out for the crap.

Creepy - Right on!

Mrs. K - There is no way your principal says some of the things I think. No way. I think it might be illegal.

Jan - You couldn't have said it better! Duct tape is never the answer when it comes to discipline.

K13 - Oh, your eyes will be opened. Just work to not become jaded. The jaded ones lose a lot of compassion for the kids.

Midwest Mommy - When I wrote this, I actually worried that people would *get* what I was talking about. I should have had more faith.

The Things We Carried - Yes, it does!

Pseudo - Good idea. Maybe I'll have some time this evening to write and email it to Movie. As for the whiners at my school, I've used you as an example several times. "You think things are hard here just because we don't have extra money for dry erase markers? I have a friend in Hawaii who is being furloughed SEVENTEEN days." It has shut every one of them up.

sun lover - You just brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for your kind words.

Christine Gram said...

What a great post. Hopefully these are the exception to the rule. I'm hoping that my daughter's first grade teacher was just having a rough day when she threatened to glue her friend to her chair.

Mike said...

I know that, Beth, I can just tell. You are like me, you are too sensitive to be the focal point for criticism and bullshit.

Anonymous said...

Oh, AMEN to so much here! I wish I could say sooooooo many of those things too!

The Peach Tart said...

Keep on ranting. It keeps you healthy.

CiCi said...

Do you have any input regarding the teachers who work at your school? It doesn't sound like it. That is a shame. Maybe you need to look at the teachers who are immature as little children in grownup bodies and give them rewards for good behavior. But that would take time and energy from your actual job. I have such fond memories of elementary school principals who helped ignite a fire to read and learn in my children and my children still talk about them and are grateful for them. You must one of them.

Linda said...

Well, at least it's Friday and you have the weekend to recharge ?

Great post, and although my kids are all grown, it's still nice to know there are educators like you out there. We need you guys.

It's obvious you wear your Big Girl Panties- why doesn't everyone else pull theirs up and get on with it?

cheatymoon said...

Beth - I wrote a donorschoose proposal last year for whiteboards and dry erase markers (and it got funded). That's how broke our district is. People need to get creative with this stuff. Complaining is oh-so-uncreative.

However, if you would like to submit a creative rant that will be therapeutically beneficial to YOU, I'd love to post it. xxoo

Brian Miller said...

great post and a great song! i imagine the world would be a much different place if we were about to say what we mean to say...the comments on parents resonates with what i do...i pretty much tell them though, because that is what i am there for luckily...feel your rant!

Unknown said...

Duct tape doesn't sound so bad when compared to the stupid parents who tied their son to a tree in their yard to punish him and he died from exposure. What are these people thinking? Oh, that's right. They don't think, or rather, they don't think like normal people. I still say no one should be allowed to have a single child until they've gotten a liscense and passed a parent test with honors; for each child!

You keep on ranting Beth, otherwise you'll get ulcers and you don't want to go there.

And remember, when it gets too bad, you always have a room at my house to get away from it all... and you can bring the whole family.

Carma Sez said...

I am still thinking about curriculum night and how few parents actually showed up. It was a fairly predicable turnout.

Sad that so few parents can take an hour or two of their time to learn more about their child's education. If parents fail to show an interest in learning, it is no wonder that their kids turn out as they are, but with fancy cellphone, I-pod, etc.

There are only so many jobs available at BK for those who have no interest in learning.

Frogs in my formula said...

Wow, that's a lot to sit quietly on. I'm not surprised you need to get some things off your chest. That's really sad about the duct tape and the mean students--you are right to ask who taught them that that was ok. I hope your venting helped.

Ash said...

I do not have enough self control to be involved in educating children - how you have not throttled a neglectful parent yet speaks volume about your character.

I would have already been locked up.

YOU make a difference.

Deanna Bland Hiott PhD, MSN, RN said...

Enjoyed catching up today; couldn't agree more...

Michel said...

Beth, your ability to keep all that in is a treasure!! You should be a diplomat. (I haven't managed to master that yet).


Lisa said...

I read this on my google reader last week and all I could muster up at the time was a big sigh. I'm not in education by any means but as a parent, I can completely relate to everything you said. I'm just sorry that you are the one that has to have a steady diet of it, my kids grew up. Anyway, I (finally) just had to comment because now every time I hear "Say what you mean to say" I think of you. Take care Beth, you are definitely one of the good guys!