Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Expect the unexpected

To borrow a word from my friend, Michel, it is UNKNOWABLE what to expect from my children. When they were little, I was often blown away by the bizarre pronouncements they would make. Seriously, what kids convince the other children in the neighborhood that they had just returned from the Poison Store and had stuff to decimate the entire block? In my defense, all they had was some dried ice that came in a package of frozen meat we had ordered.

Their imagination is often big and bizarre. And I love it!

This was the conversation at the 5K the other day.

Mr. Happy: "Oh, look. I think that is the dude who works at the Bingo place." (What!?)

Me: "You play Bingo?"

Mr. Happy: "Well, yeah. It is a lot of fun and you can win money."

Me: "Are there other people your age? And have you won any money?"

Mr. Happy: "Just my friend and I go and we haven't won anything yet but I did help this old lady once when she didn't realize she had Bingo already."

So, while some kids are playing video games or sneaking alcohol out of their parent's liquor cabinet, my son is playing the Bingo. With little old ladies.

Mr. Funny will be going to an Honor's Program this summer for 6 weeks and he is getting so excited about getting all his stuff together. He'll be living on a college campus in a dorm surrounded by other geeks Poindexters smart kids studying History and Chemistry.

As he was gathering the items on his packing list, Mr. Funny suddenly turned to me and asked (with excitement), "Should I take my horse mask?"

Me: "You have a horse mask?"

Mr. Funny: "Yeah. I keep it in the car just in case." (In case of what?!)

All I could do was stare and then laugh.

And hell yeah, he should take it!


cheatymoon said...

Oh, I love your kid. Before mine wandered over to the dark side, he was quirky that way. He may emerge as a quirky funny one yet.

My brother used to go to Bingo when he was 18.

Have a fabulous day, Beth!

mo.stoneskin said...

Horse mask? What, just a horse's head? I need to get one of those and wear it to Bingo, freak out some old ladies...

Unknown said...

YES! Mr. Funny is great! I hope he has a blast there. What an amazing opportunity for him. You must be so proud. Definitely, let him take the horse mask. HAve him also get a picture with thie bingo ladies while wearing it as well. THAT would be hilarious

Unknown said...

Mr. Funny is way cool, I'm so proud of him for you!

The horse mask comment brought to mind a wire horse head I had as a souvenier from the amateur play Equs (I know I'm not spelling that right but not awake enough to look it up) decades ago. It was a really cool horse's head!

Optimistic Pessimist said...

I love the things that come out of kids mouths. Glad to know it doesn't stop when they get older!

p.s. I got your story - thanks! I'll let you know when I'm going to post it.

JansSushiBar said...

ROFLMAO - oh, your kids would get along SO well with my kids.

Elizabeth said...

A horse's head always comes in handy! I admire your son's reasoning.
re the previous post.
Some teachers are real BABIES and mean with it.
Sad sad. I was never an administrator...thank God. Children are easier to deal with.
Silly anecdote:
some years ago I gave out an 'anonymous' survey to my graduating seniors.
I was really upset when one came back saying 'shows favoritism'
all the others were lovely
I sort of worked out whose paper it was

went up to large sweet Sean and put my arm round him
"I'm so sorry you feel this way. Who do you think my favorites are?"
Big grin.
"We is ALL your favorites, Mrs.Schmid!"
Pity the grammar lessons didn't sink in too, though I'll take character over literacy any day!

Maybe some of the weasels misunderstood your survey too.

darsden said...

LOL too funny and yes I love what the kids say too. Cracks me up all the time. I heard bingo was fun but I myself have never been. Who has time for a social life I can barely keep up with all you bloggers out there! Dammit I want to go play bingo now!

Anonymous said...

Im so glad you told him to take the horse mask! I love Mr. Funny! He's a hoot indeed!

Pseudo said...

I'm jealous. My son wants to jump off cliffs and ride dirt bikes all summer. Noteven summer school at the community college.

Kristina P. said...

So, so funny.

And I LOVE Bingo. Old people rule!

Michel said...

Shit! I don't have a horse mask!! What if I need it!?

What's goin on?? What does he know!?!??!

Mara said...

Bingo with the old ladies is definitely PG fun. Sounds like you have a good kid on your hands. Thank your lucky stars--you could have ended up with a kid like me. YIKES!

followthatdog said...

I love this kid. Seriously, you did a GREAT job making a nice AND interesting person here. Congratulations.

Dee-Zigns Handcrafted Jewelry said...

You've have very cool kids, and chose their blog nicknames perfectly. P.S. I hope he wins big at bingo soon!

Smart Mouth Broad said...

I love that kid!

Carma Sez said...

That is a great story- bingo with the grannies- it doesn't get much less reckless than that!

Missy said...

This is too funny! I just love hearing what OTHER kids say! LOL

david mcmahon said...

That's hilarious, Beth. Your narrative powers are wonderful.

In answer to your question/ comment - I use a simple Pentax K100D with an 18-125mm lens.

beth said...

i just totally cracked up about the horse mask! thanks!

Saz said...

great funny tale...congrats on potd..

fff x

Anonymous said...

Happy to have found you through authorblog, thanks David. My children are so old now that I have forgotton all the funny things they said, when. Now they keep me amused-with their take on life as 'they' know it.

Sandi McBride said...

My Lord your life is fun...good for you! And congratulations on Post of the Day mention...a worthy effort to be sure!

Unknown said...

Congrats on POTD!!!!

Elizabeth Bradley said...

Mr. Funny sounds like quite the character. I have a daughter that says the most bizarre things. She just had a baby and two weeks afterward was sitting on one of my wooden kitchen chairs holding aforementioned baby and she said, "My butt meat hurts!"

nikkicrumpet said...

LOL your children scare me....please don't move next door!