Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Just when I thought it was safe to go into the water

Drama is huge part of elementary school and we aren't talking about the plays. From what the middle and high school principals say, the drama is worse in elementary schools than any where else.


I say, what the heck did you expect with a building full of women because what we really need is more testosterone.

The first act of the day starred a student teacher and her mentor teacher. Supporting roles were played by a couple of college professors and myself. In the final scene, the student teacher was dramatically driven away from the school by one of the college professors. While it was a sad conclusion for the college student, the remaining characters were hopeful that she would one day be cast in another play with a happier ending like possibly an ending where the student teacher could learn to converse nicely with others.

The next act was a scene out of an Emergency Room. The screaming and running that resulted from a teacher who was choking because thank God she was a well loved teacher or there might have been apathy and starring ended in fits of laughter and tears when the school nurse announced, "This was just a practice drill." The emotions from the audience ranged from relief to disbelief to rage irritation. The audience was especially relieved that this drill was called off before the defibrillator was activated. Stay tuned for this exciting conclusion involving the school nurse, tar, and feathers.

As the emotions of the day were building, the next scene takes us to the disaster of an office of the principal where she was talking to the head cheese Superintendent about which teacher was going to be moved. Tears fell like wine were choked back as the biggest disappointment of the day came to light because why, oh why can't the difficult teachers ever be the ones yanked?. And why is it not kosher to portray the principal in a sobbing stance?

In the final scene, the administrator was the lone character leaving the awards banquet with a somber look of quiet desperation clearly headed for the liquor cabinet. The audience is left wondering if the situation will get better.

26 comments:

darsden said...

Hilarious...just hilarious..felt like I was right there watching :-)

Jason said...

Tune in to my blog tomorrow for the carnival of education.

Midwest Mommy said...

Ok, what is the story with the student teacher! You can't leave us hanging!

lakeviewer said...

You're having fun with this, aren't you? Especially the parts you crossed out? I disagree with your statement that drama occurs more often in elementary school. As a former middle school principal, I can tell definitely say that drama was the flavor of the day, every day. Ah, good times.

Laura said...

And I thought having my air conditioner fixed today was exciting!

H.K. said...

It certainly is never a boring day in the office! I think this would be great material for a tv series!

♥ Braja said...

Yep, photos req'd of school nurse, tar, feathers, and so on :)))

Fragrant Liar said...

If chocolate boxes were handed out on a daily basis, you would not have nearly the problems.

Candice said...

Grabbing her popcorn...

Beth said...

darsden - I wish you had been right there. Then I could have stuck you and your camera to the side to catch some of the action.

Jason - Education is a carnival? Then I want my prizes!

Midwest Mommy - I can't go into a lot of details but it involved a snippy attitude, a computer, a proxy website, and rules broken. It was quite the scene!

lakeviewer - You may be right. I used to teach in a middle school but most of the drama involved the children. In elementary school, I seem to have much more drama from the teachers and parents. But now I am missing my middle school teaching days.

Laura - Want to trade for a week?

H.K. - So who could play me? Maybe Meg Ryan (and whatever happened to her?) or possibly Kate Hudson. And I just noticed in my label that I claimed to work a 12 hour day. That really isn't true. It was just a little over 15 hours. Apparently I shouldn't try to calculate elapsed time after the sun has set.

Braja - I'll be sure to keep that camera handy. Especially now that my hands finally quit shaking.

Fragrant Liar - But wouldn't that mean more issues because isn't the chocolate for me? Truthfully, I probably ate 47 pieces of chocolate yesterday. But dark chocolate is good for you, so I figure I'm extra healthy!

Candice - If you choke on that popcorn, I fully expect you to save yourself because you are a nurse. Just sayin.

only a movie said...

Oh Beth. I hate this time of year. Drama drama drama. We've already had some dramatic declarations of the *which staff is moving where next year* variety, and it's not pretty.
Today we do the *which kid is moving to which classroom* thing. Always a struggle.
I don't have time to write about it. Damn. How do you have time? :-)

Beth said...

Only a movie - In my world, stress = lack of sleep. There are so many things I can't even write about here. We'll muddle through. Even though I was hoping this would be the year I didn't have to move so many people around. When one person is moved, it becomes like a stacked card reaction to the placement of others.

dizzblnd said...

Here I thought you were gonna talk about the students and drama. I thought NO WAY could there be more drama there than in high school. Silly me, I forgot all about the "adults"

Jan said...

This was all in ONE day?

Great balls of fire.

Gaston Studio said...

Get Darsden over there right away, like Braja, I want to see photos of the tarring and feathering!

And hey, at least you found out in advance that that particular student teacher should look for another major.

Ann's Rants said...

Sorry you're losing one of the good ones...Its hard to remember that "change is really the norm" isn't it?

marathoner81 said...

Wow - you're right...there is lots of drama. I think I'll stay drama free and just ready your blog to get my daily dose of drama.

Anonymous said...

Yes this is me again, I couldn't stay away and hopefully I have worded this in the right way to not offend anyone this time.It wasn't intended last time but getting past that.
You have never experienced drama until you have worked in a high school.We are talking 1000 kids with hormones going 50 different ways.That is just the kids,what about the teachers?Now not to talk about my own kind but women can be..... well I won't say it.
There are also some men that maybe should have been women just so they could blame their hormones. Taking a note from Jeannie C Rileys song a school can be a Peyton Place and most of the people in it are hypocrites.(Harper Valley PTA)Ha!
I admire you for working and running a school. It takes a special person and you seem to look at it with humor, which is really all you can do sometimes to survive. Keep up the good work, really!

Comedy Goddess said...

You are totally not paid enough!

Dee-Zigns Handcrafted Jewelry said...

Women, can't work with them without fighting, can't work without them because they (most of them) get the job done.

Michel said...

Which one was the student teacher? I can't follow plays until I SEE them. Please tell me there is no symbolism or allegory in this one; I never catch onto that shit until someone tells me.

You honestly do not get paid enough - and I have no idea what you make! I just know it is not enough!

Cat said...

Makes me glad I didn't go into teaching!

HeatherPride said...

Well, all I can say is that I'm currently being "interviewed" by parents looking for daytime sitters and so far there's been drama galore! Worse than elementary? I can't say. But man, I don't know that I was prepared for this!

smiles4u said...

Never a dull moment for you is there?!

Deb said...

i totally see it. my kids' elementary school was a hot bed of controversy and drama. i think because the whole school is expected to work as a team. in middle and high school, the faculty, staff and administrators all kind of disperse and hang among their departments. plus, the kids are so damn out of control, it makes co-workers band together out of fear!

Beth said...

Anonymous - Personally, I think all schools are filled with drama. I can only imagine all the drama in a high school. It probably burns some teachers out by the end of the first week of teaching. Keep posting! Anytime!