My mother is someone who lives to shop a big believer in all the hoopla that is known as Black Friday. Despite my need for rest after cooking, cleaning, and serving for three days, I agreed to, once again, go shopping with my mother at an ungodly hour. Because I am trying to get nominated for mother of the year, I dragged my two boys along, too.
After picking us up at 4 a.m., we soon found ourselves standing in the long line at Kohl’s just waiting to pay for our purchases and it was exciting because with a line like that, I just knew there had to be a ride at the end. When I noticed the red light blinking on my crackberry Blackberry, I looked to see what message I had. I didn’t recognize the number who’d sent me the text – and I was shocked when I read the message.
“You act all fly when you wit them hoes.”
Wha?! Immediately I knew I had to defend my mother’s honor. Frantically, I typed back.
“Don’t you be calling my momma a hoe.”
How rude! I can not believe someone would call my mother a garden instrument. She hates being outside (unless by outside you mean waiting in line to get in a store) and she does not do gardens even though she is an upstanding garden club member. But her secret is safe with me.
A couple of hours later, my phone rang – it was the number from the offensive text sender.
Me (irritated): “Hello.”
Offensive Text Sender: “Uh… hello?”
Me (even more irritated): “Yeah. Hello.”
Offensive Text Sender: “I think I’ve got the wrong number.”
So, there. I told him.
40 comments:
Hysterical!
I especially love this line:
"How rude! I can not believe someone would call my mother a garden instrument."
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha hahahahahahahahahhahaha...too funny.
Yo, Yo! You callin' me a rake? Biotch!!!
What is more offensive? The wrong number or the butchering of the language?
lol. way to go defending your mom...
Wrong number texting??? Ah. How wude.
Here's what you should have said.
"OH YEAH? WELL YOUR MAMA IS A ROTO-TILLER!"
that's too funny. at least you have a good black friday story.
i don't believe in shopping on big shopping days - unless it's online. i almost got my butt kicked at the VS semi-annual sale last year...over the world's most hideous panties. i pretty much steer clear of malls whenever i can...
That is just so funny. I will have to remember that line..
How you kept a sense of humor while on that Kohl's line and someone was slandering the good reputation of your mother is beyond me.
next year - amazon. They never talk smack about your family either.
You went shopping at 4:30? Was it worth it?
At least the txt was some entertainment while you stood in line...
Such a long line there must be a ride at the end. Too funny. I am sorry I could not, would not do that for my mother. You have me beat in the good daughter contest.
you are so much classier than I.
I shudder to think how I would handle the situation....in fact, can I have that phone number please?
This is WAY too good! I love it.
However, I must confess that 50 years ago (yes, I am that old--63) I loved going shopping with my mother, her two sisters, & my grandmother the day after Thanksgiving. We had such a good time. We shopped in Augusta, GA and as we drove down Broadway we'd say, "Momma, pray for a parking place!" Sometimes that worked.
Great story of you & your mom.
lmao!! too funny!! maybe you should have told them you were out wit dem hoes when they called. lol
Didn't you "ax" his name?
... and great brownie points for defending your mum.
Man, you opened up a big 'ole can o' whoop a$$ on that dude ;-)
I swear I'd rather pay retail then get up that early and I do love to shop.
also, I thought for sure it was someone you knew just trying to be funny. LOL
Garden implement... love it!
Oh well done :)))
To funny... I was also standing in line at 4 am to pay at Kohls. I think a prank text would have actually made the time go faster.
Oh this is just priceless Beth. Thanks for giving me a huge laugh which I really needed today!
PS: I love your mom; an honoary garden club member who doesn't garden! And I'll also keep her secret.
Funniest post I've read in weeks. Saw your link on Christine/Strange Pilmgam's site and thought I'd pop by and say hi. Glad I did - though I'll need to keep an eye on my own CrackBerry from now on.
:)
I LOVE that you texted him back. LOVE IT! hahaha....
LMAO! This is so funny!
I've never gotten any wrong number texts, but my friend did when she first got her new number and was pretty upset because it was a lot of dirty suggestions, and the texter didn't believe she wasn't who they thought she was. If that makes sense. lol
You sure told him! :D
My goodness! I think your wrong number did not have a good Thanksgiving!
I get wrong texts all the time...but nobody ever calls my mother a garden instrument.
;)
I am laughing out loud! That is a hoot.
As for Black Friday-- You are good. I've never done and probably never will. I need my sleep :-)
Have a great week.
jj
You did tell him. I fear black Friday.
Sorry about that, it's so easy to mistype a number.
LOL, what a hilarious message to receive as an accident!
ROFLMAO!
You tell 'em, Beth!
You let them off easy. And Black Friday? I think I'd rather pay retail.
Hilarious! I am still a techie dinosaur when it comes to texting!
Too funny! I had a similar experience. The kid asked me to send him a pic of myself once we established it was the wrong number. That's when I stopped responding. LOL
I want to shop with your mom. :-) Can I go next year?
What I actually texted you was "You act all fly when U with DEM hoes."
I laughed out loud @ your line.
OK, so where does 'Black Friday' come from? My family from the States was over and mentioned the term, but noone could figure out why it was 'black'. Is it mourning for the people that get trampled?
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